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Condo Crazies: Murder At The Albatross
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Condo Crazies
Murder at The Albatross
By Tina Nicholas
Condo Crazies
Copyright © 2015 by Tina Nicholas. All rights reserved.
First Print Edition: April 2015
Limitless Publishing, LLC
Kailua, HI 96734
www.limitlesspublishing.com
Formatting: Limitless Publishing
ISBN-13: 978-1-68058-095-2
ISBN-10: 1-68058-095-7
No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to locales, events, business establishments, or actual persons—living or dead—is entirely coincidental.
Table of Contents
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Chapter 41
Chapter 42
Chapter 43
Chapter 44
Chapter 45
Chapter 46
Chapter 47
Chapter 48
Chapter 49
Chapter 50
Chapter 51
Chapter 52
Chapter 53
Chapter 54
Chapter 55
Chapter 56
Chapter 57
Chapter 58
Chapter 59
Chapter 60
Chapter 61
Chapter 62
Chapter 63
Chapter 64
Chapter 65
Chapter 66
Chapter 67
Chapter 68
Chapter 69
Chapter 70
Chapter 71
Chapter 72
Chapter 73
Chapter 74
Chapter 75
Chapter 76
Chapter 77
Chapter 78
Chapter 79
Chapter 80
Chapter 81
Chapter 82
Chapter 83
Chapter 84
Chapter 85
Prologue
A pair of eyes squinted through the slightly opened plantation shutters. A woman and teenage girl were transferring suitcases from their car to a luggage cart in the parking lot below. More outsiders? More problems at The Albatross. More of everything.
The room’s sole occupant turned and scanned the walls, neatly tacked with photographs and news clippings. The photos were numbered and marked with precisely hand-printed swastikas or question marks in the upper right corners.
The figure bent to peer at a photograph in one of the clippings—that of a stern-faced, white-haired woman in black robes seated at a judge’s dais, gavel in hand. The heading read, “Criminal Court Judge Phoebe Burlingame sentences serial child killer to death.”
A malevolent smile spread over otherwise attractive features. You, dear judge, will be saved for last on The Albatross Death List. Let’s see how clever you are finding me before your time comes.
The plan is in place. Incompetents and condo commandos don’t deserve to live. There must be order, an accepted behavior, or chaos will rule. There’s enough madness in the world. It’s got to stop, and it will, at The Albatross. A feeling of power swept through the broker of life and death. It was such a rush playing God.
Chapter 1
“Can even hell be this hot?” Alexis yanked the last suitcase out of the trunk and turned to glare at her mother. “Mom, you can’t be serious about moving here. I mean, really—Florida? It’s not too late to go home.” She pulled her brown hair into a quick ponytail and stamped her foot at a tiny lizard sunning itself on a nearby flagstone. It skittered away. “Lizards? We don’t have lizards in New Jersey. Get real, Mom!”
Here we go, Kate thought. She’s not going to give me any slack on this move.
“No, we have the Sopranos and wanna-be Sopranos. Much safer with lizards,” Kate Parker said lightly, hoping to deter any further discussion on the topic. She finished stacking suitcases on the luggage cart, straightened up, and smiled brightly at her daughter. “It’ll be fine, Alexis, I promise you.” She ignored her daughter’s glare. “Have you ever seen tropical beauty like this?” She brushed her shoulder-length hair back and scanned the meticulously trimmed landscape.
“Listen.” Kate turned at the sound of water cascading into the giant, concrete scallop shell below an ornately carved sign “The Albatross.” A realistic wooden albatross sat on one side of the shell.
“This is pretty, admit it,” Kate said.
“An albatross? Isn’t that the bird in the ‘Ancient Mariner’? The dead one the sailors hung around the mariner’s neck? Great name for a condo building. It’s grim, is what it is,” Alexis retorted.
Before Kate could think of a reply, the lobby doors whooshed open. A slender, fortyish man wearing bright yellow walking shorts and a flowered shirt hurried toward them, arms outstretched.
***
The observer turned back to the window as a flamboyantly dressed, blond-haired man rushed from the lobby to the two females in the parking lot and embraced them.
Devin Dillon. The on-looker smirked. So gay. But he is respectful to me. He’ll have to be watched.
Chapter 2
“You made it. I was getting worried.” With one motion, he swept both Kate and Alexis into a hug. “Welcome to Juneau Beach, welcome to The Albatross. It’s so good to see you.” He beamed at them.
“Devin Dillon, you look tan and fit. And very Floridian.” Kate kissed his cheek.
“Tommy Bahama couture. Only the best for this tropical flower. Do I look ‘cool’, Miss Parker?” Devin asked, turning to Alexis.
“You always look cool.” Alexis said affectionately. “I like the new you.”
“My Floridian image.” Devin ran his fingers through his highlighted blond hair. “Palm Beach ladies want their gay designers to look ‘mod and cool.’ And speaking of cool, let’s get you out of this heat.”
He pushed the loaded cart to the building and waved a fob at the security pad, releasing the lobby door locks. Kate and Alexis followed him into the lobby. Tall windows overlooked a kaleidoscope of tropical flowers mixed with beds of ferns outside. Inside, earth-toned granite floors, amber-colored walls, and tasteful furnishings spoke of a skilled decorator’s touch in combining colors and materials.
“This is lovely, Devin,” Kate said. “It has your decorating stam
p on it…am I right?”
“Got the board to shake a few shekels loose this year for redoing the lobby, and since I offered them a discount, they let me have the job.” Devin grinned. They moved to the elevator and he pressed the button.
“It does look pretty tropical,” Alexis agreed. “So different from home.” She stopped abruptly, feeling disloyal to her native New Jersey.
“How was the ride down?” Devin asked.
“We were so anxious to get here, we only had one motel sleepover,” Kate replied. “It was a long trip, but it gave us time to talk. With Alexis going off to Princeton in two months, we had lots to talk about.”
The elevator doors slid open. A spicy gust of Gucci perfume enveloped them as a tiny gnome of a woman, capped with a cloud of pure white hair, tottered out of the elevator on three-inch heels. In a classic Versace print dress, adorned with a string of heavy, luminous pearls and matching earrings, her artfully applied makeup accentuated bright blue eyes in a face lined with years of living. Leaning on a stout, dark mahogany cane topped with the heavy silver handle of an alligator’s head with large protruding eyes, she took short but steady steps as she approached the new arrivals.
“Devin…you’re looking especially handsome today, young man.” The old woman tapped his chest with the alligator’s head, emeralds and diamonds flashing on manicured fingers. “If only I were fifty years younger.” Her perfect, overly white teeth gleamed brightly. She turned sharp eyes to Kate and Alexis. “And who are these lovely young women?”
“My dearest friends, Kate and Alexis Parker. Ladies, Judge Phoebe Burlingame, grande dame and president of The Albatross Board,” Devin introduced.
“Grande dame…that’s code for the oldest surviving resident here,” Judge Phoebe said tartly. With a brief inspection of the new arrivals, she bestowed a thump of her heavy cane. “Nice to meet you both.” The old woman glanced at the loaded luggage cart. “Sorry I can’t stay and talk. It looks like you’re busy, and I have a salon date. We’ll meet again.” Nodding once at the trio, she hobbled away, through the lobby doors and into the parking lot, car keys in hand. They watched as the octogenarian started a new, silver Mercedes sedan and drove slowly away, her head barely visible over the steering wheel.
“Ohmigod, she drives,” Alexis murmured.
“Welcome to Florida, Alexis. Judge Phoebe’s only the first of hordes of older people you’ll see around here who drive. Just don’t be in front of or behind their cars. Could be dangerous to your health,” Devin said, only half-joking. He pushed the luggage cart into the waiting elevator.
“I get the distinct impression Judge Phoebe’s a force to be reckoned with,” Kate observed.
“She was a judge in the Manhattan circuit court. A really tough one, I’m told. She’s president of our board of directors and keeps everything in order—nothing escapes her. Let’s get y’all settled in.” Devin beamed at his guests, obviously delighted they would be part of his life, at least for a little while.
***
The sentinel at the window tensed at the sight of the elderly woman getting into her car. There she goes. Enjoy your day, dear judge…you’ve only a few of them left.
Chapter 3
Kate and Alexis followed Devin into one of the two brass and glass elevators.
“Alexis, love, press ‘Penthouse.’” He shot Kate a questioning look when Alexis’s back was turned. Kate shook her head and shrugged
“I’m impressed,” Alexis said. “You never mentioned you lived in a penthouse.”
“Actually, I didn’t until just this year. I was on a lower floor, and when the foreclosures started, I kept my eye on this unit and lucked out. I got it for a good price, gutted it, and decorated it just the way I wanted.”
“And gave it the Devin Dillon touch, I’m sure,” Kate said.
“You tell me.” Devin winked at her.
The elevator slid to a smooth stop and dinged on the fifteenth floor. The doors opened silently. Before them was a long, dark green-carpeted hallway, dimly lit by large Murano scallop-shaped glass wall sconces.
“Only two units on the penthouse level,” Devin explained. “We’re Penthouse Two, on the end.” He pushed the luggage cart along the corridor, its rubber wheels silent on the plush carpeting.
Penthouse One’s door opened a crack. A heavily-lashed, dark eye peered out at them. “Good afternoon, Delores,” Devin sang out. Immediately, the door snapped shut. “Delores Pruitt, Condo Commando Extraordinaire. Never sleeps, rarely leaves her unit, but sees and knows everything going on in the building and the parking lot. Can’t figure out how she does it but she does. Mean as a witch. No one’s ever going to nominate her for Miss Congeniality, for sure.”
Devin unlocked his door and swung it open. Soft shades of yellow, green, and raspberry greeted them as they left the foyer and entered the spacious living area.
“Oh, Devin, it’s magnificent.” Kate turned in a circle, taking in floor-to-ceiling panoramic views of the Intracoastal Waterway, golf greens, and turquoise-blue ocean. “Just breathtaking.” She looked about her. “And the decorating is perfect.”
“Wow,” Alexis agreed, impressed in spite of herself.
“Mi casa es su casa.” Devin finished bringing in the last of the suitcases, stopped, and beamed at his guests. “I’m so happy you’re here. Alexis, I’m putting you in the bedroom overlooking the waterway. There’s a great view of boats coming and going. Kate, your room is on the ocean side, very restful.” He rubbed his palms enthusiastically. “Are you hungry? I’ll give you a half hour to stash your stuff and then I’ll take you out to lunch at one of my favorite restaurants. Ally, you’re going to love Guanabanas. It’s as tropical as it can be. Nothing like New Jersey—much better,” he teased.
“I’ll be the judge of that.” Alexis sniffed.
Chapter 4
“Here we are.” Devin pulled into the short driveway. “They’ll park the car for us.”
Two young men hastened to open the doors for Kate and Alexis.
“Welcome to Guanabanas.” One of the valets looked at Alexis. “Welcome to Florida.”
“How did he know I wasn’t from here?” Alexis asked Devin as they walked into the restaurant.
“Paleface not have tan,” Devin joked. “Most of the kids here are tanned from boating or swimming, or just being outdoors.”
Overlooking the Intracoastal, Guanabanas could have been in Costa Rica. Lush, tropical foliage, tiki huts, island music, Key West atmosphere. The setting immediately captured Alexis’s imagination.
“I need to do something about this windblown hair,” Kate said, glancing at her reflection in the glass door. “See you at the table.” She ducked into the women’s lounge.
Alexis forgot to appear unimpressed as she looked at diners in tropical attire, others arriving by the waterway and docking their boats. Paddle-boarders floated by, laboriously working their oars downstream.
“Looks like Disneyland,” she commented, as they were seated at a table overlooking the waterway.
Devin looked at Alexis. He paused for a moment, apparently searching for the right words. “Alexis, we have a few minutes alone here—want to talk?”
She shrugged. “About what?”
“About what’s happened and how you’re going to handle it.”
There was no response. Head bent, she traced a pattern on the placemat with her finger.
“Ally, you’ve heard the saying, ‘Life deals you a hand of cards?’”
She nodded, still not meeting his eyes.
“Well, life has dealt you some bad cards, no doubt about it. And the rest of your life depends on how you’ll play those cards. You play them poorly, life will be a misery. You play them wisely, you’ll win the game.”
“Easy for you to say. Your father didn’t leave you to become a monk,” Alexis blurted. “I thought it was okay when he shaved his head and grew a beard. Lots of men do. And it wasn’t too bad when he started walking around the house and neighborhood i
n his monk robe, chanting, even though the neighbors didn’t like to see or hear it. One woman said it made her property values go down.”
Alexis swiped at her tears and swallowed. “But then he started going to Shop Rite in his robe and barefoot. My friends never laughed to my face but I heard them talking when I passed their lockers. His law partners didn’t like the incense in his office but when he went to work in his robe—well, you know the rest of the story.” Her hands balled into fists. “He didn’t care about what he was doing to us. About how weird he looked and made us look as a family. And then we leave our home as if we’re the guilty ones? Can you understand how that makes me feel?” She raised troubled eyes to him.
“What are you hoping for yourself?”
“That I’ll wake up one day and not be so mad at my da—at him. That I won’t be angry because Mom moved us to Florida and I didn’t have much say about it. God, look at this place. It’s nice, but I feel so strange here, like I just don’t belong. It’s good for a vacation, but live here? It’s not Rumson, New Jersey…y’know?” She shook her head as her gaze wandered around the tropical setting.
“Surroundings look different, but people are the same.”
“We didn’t have to move away from our home.” Her mouth was set in a grim line.
“I’ve known your mom since I was eleven. She didn’t decide on the move without talking to you, did she?”
“I didn’t want to hear it,” Alexis said, shaking her head. “I didn’t want to leave my friends and home.”
Devin leaned in and lowered his voice. “The same friends who were laughing at you? Your mom did what she thought best to survive and go on with life. Think what it would have been like living in Rumson and how much playacting you’d have to do to outsiders. Lots of painful memories for both of you.” He looked over her shoulder. “Here comes your mom. I’m always here when you need someone to talk to.” He patted her hand.